Thursday, March 14, 2013

Been Self-Conscious About Myself Lately


After I started working at Toy R Us, I was beginning to get dark spots on both my cheeks, around the bottom of my eyes, and on the top of my forehead. Since that was a stressful hell of the job, since I was working holiday season, and plus I was in school at the time. I just assume that it was from stress and not getting enough sleep.
After I left Toy R Us (it was only a season job), my face started to clear up a little bit, but then a week later it started breaking out again. Since I was about to start the spring semester of college, once again I thought it was from stress. But suddenly my breakouts started to get worse; it looked like I had bruises all over my face, plus the hair that was in the middle of my head was falling out.
So I went to the doctor.
Well, it turns out that my eczema has returned
If you don’t know what eczema is, it is a skin disorder. Here some links for more information:
I always knew that I had eczema, but I haven’t had a breakout since eight or so years ago, and at that time I thought It was my first breakout, but my mother mentions that I had a breakout when I was way younger.
Anyway, with my face looking like I just been in a boxing match and lost, and my hair constantly falling out. My mom and my two of my sisters have it WAY worse than I have it, beside my face looking bruised, and my hair falling out, I only had breakouts in certain areas of my body. Compare to them, my breakout is very mild.
But this breakout has made me very insecure to the point I wear a hoodie when I got out, my confident level went down a little bit, and almost every day I constantly look into the mirror, examining myself from top from bottom.
My number one goal in life is to be a WWE Diva, and my skin disorder might hold me back from achieving that. But just like Shelly Martinez says “Positive Vibes!  Positive Vibes!”
But it still sucks.

 
I’m still a Goddess!

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